Brene Brown on "owning" your pain (really?)
“When you deny your story, it owns you.
When you own your story, you get to write your own brave ending.
When you deny your pain, it owns you.
When you own your pain, it sets you free.” Brene Brown.
You may wonder how on earth you can “own your pain”. Surely you want to get rid of pain, not get any closer to it or make it more real. Surely pain has had enough of your time, your energy, your emotions, and you just want rid.
What Brene is talking about is a healing paradox. The more you come closer to your pain, to start identifying all the horrible aspects it carries, the more you can tangibly empower yourself to heal from, and then discard, the pain.
Yes, there will probably be tears and emotions as you go through this process, but once that’s done, you are ‘set free’. It’s a bit like ripping of the Band Aid/plaster – there is an ouch moment, but when it’s done, you’re done. And your time, energy and emotions are yours to plan, control, enjoy, use – whatever language you choose that enables you to own the rest of your life in the most fulfilling way.
Owning your pain – and learning more about how it controls you, your life, your energy – allows to get rid of your pain.